Formerly, Jayme Nourallah Photography, Miette Photography is my little boutique photography business in Dallas, Tx. The word Miette, besides being my daughter's name, is a French term of endearment that means little crumb - usually of the cake variety. I thought this name suited my business since it is just a tiny one-girl show run entirely by myself and possibly a hoard of elves who come in and do weird stuff at night. I can't be positive about that though.
I love love love my job. I love newborns, babies, and kids and I love capturing their beautiful little personalities. I love the new baby smell, the tiny, wrinkled hands and feet that turn into giant, chubby mashed potato hands and feet. I love how children express every emotion freely and instantaneously. I love how they can make a new best friend in 2 seconds based on a mutual fondness for cheese. I love how serious they are about silly things and silly about the serious things. I love my job so much that I am going to prattle on and on about it in this blog. So, if you like photography, kids, and the occasional navel-gazing and incoherent ramblings of an overworked mom of two - then, bingo!
So I was playing with my daughter a few days ago and she decided to play “mommy” and have me play “baby go-go.” My first thought was, “who showed my child a Lady Ga-Ga video?” But then I realized she had gotten the name from Yo Gabba Gabba – or what I like to call “when mommy vacuums.” This is how it went:
Me: “mama!”
Miette: “Sorry, I have to go now.”
Then she hopped off the bed and left the room. Yep. That’s what she thinks of mommy right now – always leaving.
BAD MOMMY has been working ridiculous amounts of time since Miette was born. I used to edit photos WHILE nursing her, and then just hand her back to dad. I have had to make a concerted effort to spend time with her just playing or cuddling. I didn’t have to do that with my son – I was working less and he was an only child so life was EASY. I vaguely remember cooking too.
But then I doubled my workload and doubled my children and everything started to go wrong. Anyone who has a second kid will tell you, it’s not twice the work as one, it is 10 TIMES THE WORK. It’s true. You find yourself trying to give the same attention to your second child as you did your first which is impossible because the first child still expects that much attention – UNDIVIDED ATTENTION. There just is no such thing anymore. So when they are together, there is a constant struggle between them to get MORE of YOU and a constant struggle within yourself to be FAIR. Oh – and remember that job? The job that you now desperately need to be successful because kids are freaking EXPENSIVE? Well, that is not going away – it just gets more demanding, especially when you work for yourself. Many people think that working for yourself means extra free time and flexibility. Yea, there is some flexibility there. My husband and I could take off a week of work to take the kids on a vacation without having to ASK someone. But then who is earning money to pay the bills? It’s not just the expense of the actual travel involved, but the expense of having NO INCOME during that time period. And free time? WHAT?! Not when you work from home. The phone is always on and the emails and questions keep coming in and as much as you try to get away from it, it puuuuuuuuulls you back in. We set aside days for “family time” but then there is always that one customer who absolutely can not book a session any other day of the week except THAT day. And you need the money. And you tell yourself, “next weekend.” And then your spouse, who also works from home gets pulled in. Wash, rinse, repeat.
So, that is my life right now. Trying so hard to find that balance between making enough and being “present” enough. There is no easy answer. A lot of the time I fail. Miserably. But ultimately my kids are going to be happier with more of me than with more money so I am forcing myself to set work aside and just STOP now. I am forcing actual work hours and penciled in PLAY TIME. Scheduling it the same way I would a totally stupid and time-consuming but somehow necessary phone call to my bank – only it’s way more fun to pretend to be in a submarine dressed as an underwater Sith Lord than it is to talk to your bank.
Thankfully, 95% of my customers have children and will understand when I say, “I’m sorry, I can not book time that day because that is family day, and my daughter can be scary when thwarted.”
On that note, here are some photos of lovely kids doing lovely kid things…
By the title I am sure you thought you were going to get a post about some private lady things. Well, I tricked you. That post is coming later, thanks to some info about a creepy gynecologist from one of my friends. But for now, the lady business I’m talking about is MOTHER’S DAY.
Apparently, it is coming. I have no idea what day it is but it is LOOMING. And since I keep getting requests for photo gift ideas for Mother’s Day, I thought I would post some useful items I sell/do. But FIRST, let’s take a look at what usually goes down on Mother’s day.
Here’s what my mom is going to get. Macaroni Jesus. This is actually a still from the Vicar of Dibley that I swiped off the googlyweb, but I am pretty sure I can top this one because mine will include noodle lepers.
Another great idea that moms everywhere love is the SCENTED CANDLE. This says, “I stopped by CVS on the way here and picked this up especially for you. Because I care and because I know how much you like wax.”
But if you actually do care for your mother, wife, daughter (Mother’s Day only goes UP in my family as decreed by my mother so I get no acknowledgment or credit here for having birthed my spawn) then do something NICE for her. For REAL. TAKE THAT WOMAN TO LUNCH – someplace fancy where they serve hot tea and sandwiches with no crusts. Some moms like that. Take her on a home tour or better yet, get her tickets for a home tour and let her take a friend. Maybe she doesn’t want you crampin’ her style. Take her to a shooting range and give her a target shaped like your dad’s beer belly. I know the Dallas ladies love to shoot stuff.
Or – and here comes the shameless self promotion – buy her a gift certificate for a photography class or a photo session. I even sell some pretty amazing photo jewelry. Send me a photo from a past shoot or even an old photo and have it transformed into something she can wear and show off.
So there are your options. I gave you plenty. My work is done here.
I gotta go. Macaroni Jesus is NOT going to make himself.
So. I suck at French. I’m just going to admit to that now so that if I ever say anything Frenchy on here and it turns out to be utter garbage, then, well, I warned you.
This fact is not keeping me from continuing my class, however. I am still trying. Though my teacher and my classmates think I am mildly retarded, I just keep showing up. I seem to be doing fine in pronunciation, it’s COMPREHENSION that escapes me. My teacher is no longer speaking to us in English at all so I spend most of my time there mouth agape, with a quizzical look on my face. That is me saying, “WHAT?!” because I can not remember the French word for “WHAT?!” So I have become incredibly good at reading and mimicking body language, gestures and facial expressions. In other words, I am not learning French so much as learning MIME. I got through one and a half hours of my two hour class tonight not understanding ONE WORD anyone was saying but I still managed to answer questions by simply repeating anything that was said to me – with a lot of emphasis and enthusiasm.
Armed with my new mime-knowledge, the next time I go to France, instead of just looking confused and terrified when anyone speaks to me I will confidently repeat what they say, raise one eyebrow and throw both hands into the air with a flourish. Hopefully this will make them feel so sorry for me that they give me a chair and a cold drink while looking for a translator.
A few weeks ago a friend of mine sent me an article written by a mom complaining about being a mom. It’s easy to do. I do it a lot.
This mom was saying how she gets really annoyed when she is out with her screaming kids and someone, inevitably an old person, says to her, “Enjoy them while they last. They grow up so fast!” I loved the article, it was funny and smart and while I was reading it I completely agreed with her sentiment. But I have thought a lot about it since then and have realized that I DON’T actually share her sentiment. I guess in my heart I am a little old lady because I know they grow up fast and I am kind of obsessed with it. I actually do try to enjoy every second of it. I really really do.
Well, obviously, it is not possible to enjoy your kids EVERY second because kids can be totally unenjoyable horrible.
A lot.
My daughter, for example, is what you would call a “strong-willed child.” She was the perfect baby for the first two weeks of her life. I mean PERFECT. She was pink and fat and snuggly and SHE NEVER MADE A SOUND. I couldn’t believe that I had given birth to such chubby perfection. And then on day 15 it was like she woke from a 14 day VALIUM COMA. And she was pissed. She started screaming and trying to tear my face off and then pretty much stayed like that until about 3 months ago. She is much sweeter now, but really, for a while, I was considering boarding a plane to South America with nothing but a passport, a wig, and some Midol.
So yea, despite all that I actually do try to enjoy my kids because I am totally obsessed with them growing older and not needing me anymore. They are going to have to pry my nasty wrinkly old fingers off of their little faces when they go to college. Or maybe not. Maybe by then I will be so sick of them that I will give them a set of luggage for their graduation gift like my parents did. Yea, I got that message, and it was not “Oh, please stay.”
I am sure I am not the only parent that over-thinks everything. I ruin plenty of great moments for myself by thinking, “this is so cute, I don’t ever want this moment to end because the very next moment they may be dating and smoking pot and listening to music that I think is total crap.” There have to be other people like me out there, right? I mean, when some little old lady tells me to “enjoy them” while I am in line at Target, my first thought is, “Jesus, I do not want to get old,” (obviously), but my second thought is, “you’re right, they do grow up fast and even though my two year old is gnawing through a package of cheese and my eight year old is knocking things off shelves in a light-saber duel with a mannequin, I love the little bastards and I want them to stay like this forever. FOREVER!!!”
Now, I do agree with the article’s main point which was, stop trying to be perfect and to make every moment meaningful and scrap-book every booger they pick out of their nasty face. Because THAT I can totally get behind – NOT being the perfect mom. I have that covered. Sometimes I am a really bad mom. Sometimes I yell. Sometimes I yell really stupid stuff like, “STOP YELLING!!!!” and, “I swear to god, if you do that again I will SHAVE YOUR HEAD!!!” And sometimes when they are jabbering on and on about something I will only pretend to listen because I am thinking of something far more important like “when the hell is Mad Men starting again? Did I miss the first episode? I should go check. I don’t want to miss it, so I’ll check…”And just yesterday I cleaned my daughter’s feet with Windex. Yea, you heard me, WINDEX.
So what is my point? My point is, that while I know it is impossible to enjoy every moment with my kids, I think it is sweet when a little old lady tells me, “they grow up so fast,” because they do. And hers did. So she knows. So I try. And I often fail. But when I succeed, it is wonderful. I DO enjoy them. Sometimes even when they are being total a-holes.
Oh so true! How do I know it? I’m a little old lady who raised 3 kids.
P.S. Great photos!
Tasanee -February 29, 2012 - 11:07 pm
Oh it’s so true. I look at my kids and I’m like “can’t you get it yourself?” and on the other hand I’m like “no, let mommy do it!” Aw, don’t you just love your kids always keeping you zig-zagging not only literally around the house but mentally too with how you want them to progress but then again you don’t!! It’s crazy.
So one of my twins is 100% potty trained and the other hasn’t a shred of desire. That’s what we all need– twins! One to grow up fast and the other to resist it. It’s like two people living as one person’s before and after…sort of a real life time machine. Or it’s like living with a Jekyll & Hyde! It’s all good stuff, just like your blog. Great post, Jayme. As always!
Tami Hoey -February 29, 2012 - 10:35 pm
Love this latest post, Jayme. You captured perfectly the mom quandry of wanting to throttle them, yet panicking at the thought of them growing a day older. We all do it, daily. I’ve just never read it expressed quite so well and with so much hilarious snarky humor! Valium coma..saber duel with a mannequin? Priceless!
Since I usually spend a lot of time and energy complaining about Dallas for various reasons, which are mostly obvious, I am officially apologizing to my fair city of AWESOME WEATHERNESS right now.
Dear Dallas, I am sorry for most of the things I have said about you. Some of them are just FACTS, so I can’t take them all back, but others may have included an exaggeration or two. And some cursing. Sorry. I sort of love you right now.
This winter has been the most amazing spring we have ever had. Granted, it is getting cold now, but not STUPID COLD like Canada, so I’m still pretty happy.
Due to all this freaky spring time I have been able to do lots of outdoor shooting. Here are a couple of kids playing outside on a lovely 75 degree January day…
by jayme
2 comments
Yep. Fer real. Good one. Cheers, Jayme.
I adore you. Big hugs.